ecomorons.org

OPEN LETTER:
Citizens of San Francisco! Can’t you do better than this? Nights of intense research lead our reporters to this dimly lit, meager display. Is that really all there is? Don’t you grasp the idea of 21st century Christmas? What part of wasting power don’t you understand?
Just trying to help.
Yours sincerely, Ecomorons

PS: We kindly invite our readers in San Francisco to join this photo contest with entries of insane Christmas lights displays.

(photo: Backhouse Images)

Just arrived! It’s the first European entry in our current photo contest.
Ivo sends us this image (and he admits he shamelessly stole it from a postcard) of a crazily festive house in Niendorf, which is a neighborhood of Hamburg, Germany. The dwelling seems to be inhabited by English speakers, since they have an electric “Merry Christmas” sign on their garage. Or maybe the “Fröhliche Weihnachten” is just too hard to build from light bulbs. Those Umlauts can be a killer!

This photo contest will be open till midnight (PST) on Christmas Eve.
Email your insanest Christmas lights display pics to: contest@ecomorons.org
First prize: one handmade beeswax candle

The best entries will be posted on this site. Please include your name and location as well as where you found the lights. If you wish to remain anonymous, your name will not be posted. No one’s email will be published or shared!

(photo: Lupus Korridor)

Location of the above beauty: South Pasadena, CA
The contest: Ecomorons dares every reader to find a more insane Christmas lights display than this
Email your insanest pics to: contest@ecomorons.org
First prize: one handmade beeswax candle
The pep talk: You can do it! Get your camera out!

The contest closes at midnight (PST) on Christmas Eve. The best entries will be posted on this site. Please include your name and location as well as where you found the lights. If you wish to remain anonymous, your name will not be posted. No one’s email will be published or shared!

(photo: Backhouse Images)

Location: San Marino, CA
Signature landscaping style in town: lawns on the sidewalk
Climate: dry-summer subtropical zone
Conditions at the moment: drought
Community demography: according to US Census data, San Marino’s population was 12,945 in the year 2000; median household income was $117,267; the town covers an area of 9.8 kilometers (3.8 square miles) in Los Angeles County
If you do lawn tourism here by bike: you are probably doing something illegal. According to City Code chapter 13 you need to buy a $6 Dollar license to operate your bike “propelled wholly or in part by human power, upon any street, public path or way” within City Limits.
Note to owners: What did you do to that palm tree?

Location: Palm Beach, FL
Climatic conditions at the moment: drought
Owner: Nelson Peltz
Water use over past 12 months: 57,000 gallons a day
Water use of average single family household in Southern Florida: 54,000 gallons per year
In plain English: Mr. Peltz uses more water within 24 hours than an average home uses in a whole year.
How we know this: We read it in Robert Frank’s Wealth Report at the Wall Street Journal online.
Note to owner: We are aware that your next door neighbor is Donald Trump, who we featured in Insane Lawns (2). We suspect there is some kind of lawning contest going on between you two. We solemnly declare it a tie.

(photo: Sotheby’s)

Location: Palm Beach, FL
Climatic conditions at the moment: drought
Owner: Donald Trump. He put the property up for sale. Asking price: 125 Million Dollars.
Mystery: Why would anyone want to sell such a beautiful lawn?
Note to owner: Don’t budge on the price! Your lawn is worth much more.

(photo: Sotheby’s)

Location: Pasadena, CA
Climate: dry-summer subtropical zone
Conditions at the moment: drought; the City of Pasadena is experiencing its driest year since recordkeeping started in 1878
Survival of this lawn guaranteed by: excessive use of water, fertilizer, power tools

Note to owners: We think your lawn is too small. Please get a lawn-enlargement.